Chapter 41

Hey everyone! Thank you to everyone being so reasonable about my hectic schedule of posting! And I hope everyone is enjoying the length of the chapters, i'm trying to make them super super super long! SUPER SUPER SUPER NOTICE! THE NEXT CHAPTER WILL BE THE LAST CHAPTER OF THE STORY!!!

something happened in my life that made me unable to post, so please understand why i didn't write any new chapters!

I'm really sad that this story is ending, but I can't wait for everyone to know the whole story.

ALSO, feel free to ask me anything on ask.fm! ask.fm/unexpectedparadise


Enjoy!
-


*yousef 



When we arrived at my house, Sara was awake, silently walking besides me. We walked inside, and I prayed my father wasn't home. Luckily, he was out, leaving the house empty. The rest of the guys went upstairs, sensing the tension in the air. She sat down in the living room, staring blankly ahead of her, her eyes wide in horror.





''Sara?'' No reply. ''Sara, let me see your arms, they're all scratched up. and your lip....'' My sentence trailed off. I was afraid to say the wrong thing. I was torn between wanting to go up to her and hug her and make her feel better, and wanting to maintain the new found distance. What happened? How did it happen? Did he hurt her? Did she still hate me? Did she still love me? What was she thinking right now? Millions and millions of questions raced through my mind, making my head feel like it was going to explode any second.





I went to go get all of the first aid supplies, thoughts still buzzing in my head. I went back to her, seeing her arms wrapped around her skinny body, her face pale. I sat down next to her, trying to find the right words to say. ''Can you just let me see your arms?'' I murmured. She hesitated, but eventually dropped her arms, revealing the bloody scratch marks on her arms.





I silently cleaned the wounds, waiting for her to say something, anything. Finally, she spoke, breaking the silence. ''Thanks for saving me.'' she whispered. I didn't reply. I couldn't. Not with all of my bottled up words spilling out of my mouth. All of the things I've kept myself from saying for such a long time. Look at what happened to her. It was all of my fault. Her once glowing, radiant face was pale and tired looking, her body reduced to skin and bones, resembling a walking skeleton.





She was slowly dying, and I was the one the blame.





I bandaged her arm, tilting her face up so I could examine the cut on her lip. I concentrated on that, ignoring the silence. Every few minutes she would take a short gasp of air, as if she was about to say something, then abandoning the thought. Once I had cleaned the cut, I put the stuff back, going back and sitting down next to her. She refused to look at me, gluing her eyes to her lap. I felt frozen, unable to say anything.





''Sara, I'm sorry.'' I choked out.''Don't! Yousef stop it.'' She yelled, jumping up from her seat. ''Sara, what are you-'' I tried to say, her screams drowning out my voice. ''Yousef stop! Do you really think you can just say sorry? I can't take this anymore! All of the shit that happened, and you expect to say sorry and have everything forgiven?! You left me with no explanation, nothing! Even after you knew that what happened with me was a misunderstanding. You left me! You left me here all alone! Why did you leave me?!'' She yelled, tears spilling down her cheeks.




''Sara I'm sorry! I left because I didn't want you to hurt! I didn't want to have to tell you anything and have you hurt! Sara, I'm so sorry! I would never, ever try to hurt you. Sara I love you!'' I yelled back, desperate to make her understand. I got up, trying to make her talk to me. I wanted her to understand. I didn't want her to hurt like this. This is what I had tried to avoid. And now it was all coming back.
                             




''Sara, I'm sorry. I only left because I didn't want to hurt you.'' I whispered, putting my hand on her back. ''Don't touch me.'' She shot, her words hitting me like daggers. She moved away from me, trying to conceal the tears flowing out of her eyes.''Sara, I didn't mean for any of this to happen!'' I yelled, begging her to understand. ''I can't tell you because I know it'll hurt you!''




''Well, Yousef. I'm already hurt. So why not just get it over with.'' She said, looking up at me. So I told her everything. The dating, Rama, all of the things I had tried to keep for her all this time. When I finished, she had a look of horror on her face, like she was begging me to take back everything I had said. I wished I could, I really did. We sat there in silence for what seemed like forever, before she got up and left the house without another word. I wanted to stop her, but deep down I knew I couldn't. I wasn't Yousef to her anymore. I was this horrible, awful person who made her life a living hell. I hoped, prayed, that she would understand and forgive me.




But deep down I knew that things would never be the same.



*sara

Sunday. 


I woke up drenched in sweat, my tired eyes adjusting to the dark light of the room. Memories from Thursday flooding into my mind. This really happened to me? Reality sank in, and all I wanted to do was just go back to bed. I remembered the fight with me and Yousef, and him telling me everything. I can't believe he didn't tell me. He didn't tell me anything. Once I got home, it was the hardest. Everything crashing down at me all at once. I felt so betrayed. Destroyed.




Amal and all of the girls were here as soon as I got home. They asked me question after question, relentlessly  bugging me. I didn't want to here them, so I shut myself in my room and told them to go away. A while later Shoug showed up, and I told her everything. I was so torn and confused and angry and upset and tired. I just felt tired, of everything. 




I hated the person who did that to me. How he treated me like nothing. Didn't he once think about how he would effect me? How every second he kissed me, his filthy, disgusting hands tracing over my body. I loathed him. He was the reason I had bruises all over myself. Why every time I thought of it, the pain would be unbearable. He was the reason I just wanted to die.



I checked the clock, realizing that it was only 6:00. I turned on the bright light, squinting around my room. I looked at my phone, finding 40 new whatsapps and texts from Yousef, even though I had only shut off my phone 6 hours ago. With much self argument, I read them, tears welling in my eyes. Each one begging and pleading me to forgive him. Half of me wanted to block him, and throw him out of my life. Another half wanted to kill myself for being so stubborn.



''Don't you dare forgive him! Don't you realize what he did to you? He broke your heart. He doesn't care. No one cares about you. You're too ugly and fat to be cared about anyway. So why do you even care? Are you serious?'' A voice in my head yelled at me.




 I processed the thoughts, when another voice shouted in my mind. ''Sara! Yousef loves you and, lets face it, you still love him! Look at how much he's trying! over 200 messages in not even 3 days! If he didn't love you or care about you, he wouldn't still be trying. Don't be so stubborn and reply. Sara you're going to be happier with him. You are!'' It screamed.




Another feeling suppressed all others, forcing me to recognize the sharp pain coming from my stomach.



Hunger.



I was so unbelievably hungry, my body aching for nutrition. But I couldn't, I just couldn't. The mere thought of food made me want to murder myself. The feeling of food in my stomach made feel like a failure. A complete failure. I rain my hand across my back, feeling my fingers trace across my spine. the outline of my ribs stuck out of my chest, and big blackish-blue bruises covered my collar bones. Looking back at it, I should have been horrified with myself. But I just felt overweight, fat, too big.




My phone alarm snapped me out of my thoughts, the upbeat music blasting the serene silence. I turned off the alarm, reluctantly getting out of bed and going to take a shower, the freezing cold water jolting my body awake. I slipped on my uniform, straightened my hair and put it in a ponytail, slipping on my boring school shoes. I gazed at myself in the mirror, the dark circles around my eyes giving away my usual 'everything is perfect' act. I tried to remember the old me in this mirror, picturing the me from last summer. I was so bright and happy. Rolling my eyes at my reflection, I grabbed my bag and my phone, ignoring the 5 new messages from Yousef, and walked out the door.



Amal, as usual, was taking forever to get ready, threatening to make us late. Fahad was oblivious to everyone and everything, his eyes permanently glued to the screen of his new iphone, chatting away with Dana. ''Good morning.'' I said, sitting on the dining table, sipping my coffee. He merely nodded, continuing to type away. I sighed as Amal ran downstairs, looking perfect, as always. I could see the nervousness in her smile, the sadness in her eyes as she looked at me. I felt so bad for her, having to deal with such a messed up stepsister like me.




''Good morning!'' She said, her fake tone trying to lighten up everyone's mood. I rolled my eyes for the second time that day, continuing to slowly sip my coffee, dreading the school day to come. My father put down his phone suddenly turning to me, a hint of curiosity in his eyes. ''So, Sara. Why haven't you been hanging out with Yousef?'' He toyed, glancing at me over the rim of his coffee cup.




''We've been really into our studies. There's a lot of pressure with university and stuff.'' I said, trying to keep the tone in my voice casual. I could sense Amal shooting me a nervous glance, but I brushed it off. ''Sara,'' My father laughed, ''You still have time. You're an A student. Relax.'' His tone suddenly got serious, dripping with concern. ''Honey, I've noticed you a lot lately. You're so skinny. You're always tired. You never talk to the family anymore. You hardly ever go out. You just stay in your room all day! We're just worried about you.''



''So now you notice? I've been wasting away, while you've barely said anything to me this whole time, and now you're just going to try and tell me that you're worried?'' I screamed in my head.



''Baba, I'm fine. Really.'' I reassured him, trying to keep the venom out of my voice. ''Alright,'' He sighed, giving me a suspicious look. '' I'm leaving for a business trip today, i'll be back next thursday. You know all the numbers, and you can call me whenever you would like to. Be good, okay?''


Thankfully I heard Fahad's voice yell out that we were gonna be late if we didn't get going.''Of course. Have a good trip!'' I smiled at my dad, kissed his forehead and walked out of the door.




At school, I tried to act as normal as possible around everyone, and surprisingly, my act worked. I explained to my friends how I was feeling better about the situation and I wasn't as torn apart as they thought I was. After countless questions, they actually bought it. I pulled the regular charade, ignoring Faris, Turki, Omar, Hussain, and Sultan. I simply acted like they didn't exist.



Everything dragged on and on.



Shoug trying to shove food in my face, whining that I was going to ''disappear'' if I didn't eat something. I ignored her, as usual. School wasn't an issue for me. I always just did well in school. I already had enough problems, I wasn't going to make schoolwork one of them. I excelled, as usual. Breaks were full of chatting, faking interest, and getting asked questions. I brushed it all off, smiling, saying I was fine, as usual. Everything just went as usual.



I was sitting in Arabic class, waiting for the day to be over. We had a free period, so I took the opportunity to think. Just think about everything. After 20 minutes, I came to a conclusion. I knew was that I was unhappy. I was so unbelievably unhappy with my life. ''Well, that needs to change. NOW.'' I shouted in my head, making myself smile. ''Well, what makes me happy?'' I asked myself. I ripped out a piece paper from my notebook and slowly began listing them all down.


-old episodes of FRIENDS
-seeing people smile
-Funny youtube videos
-Frilly skirts
-Pink bows
-The internet
-Shopping
-Video games
-the sound of rain
-red lipstick 
-black and white movies
-Good hair days

I thought for a while about the other things that made me happy.Who made me feel happy when I was with them?

-My Dad and his caring
-Fahad and his energy
-Aziz and his protectiveness 
-Shoug and her wild-ness 
-Ghalia and her curiosity
-Amal and her bubbly-ness 
-Lulu and her innocence. 

I threw away my stubbornness, scribbling down all the names of the people i've been trying to block out of my life on the page.


-Turki and his 'dont talk to me i'm eating' mood
-Omar and his clumsiness 
-Faris and his nerdy jokes
-Sultan and his awkward moments
-Hussain and his inner artist


Finally, I let out a big sigh, my brain feeling like it was being thawed out. I was done being unhappy. I was going to let myself understand how to forgive again. I knew I could start trusting people again. I scribbled the final name on my list, feeling light headed.



-yousef and his love

-
hope everyone enjoyed that chapter! LAST CHAPTER COMING AS SOON AS POSSIBLE! like I said, I have a lot of serious things going on in my life, please respect that and i'll try to post as soon as possible! thank you all so much for reading and commenting and loving the story! It means a lot, i never thought this many people would actually be into my story. thank you so much! xoxo - wonderwall<3

Chapter 40

My first chapter of 2013! happy new year everyone, I hope you had a blast! :D and HUGE news! well, I might be revealing who i am (like telling you all my name/who I am) at the end of the story! no promises, it's just something i'm lightly considering right now.

enjoy!
-


I took a deep breath, trying to edge away from the large group of people staring down at me, their hungry looks burning into my eyes.




''Do whatever you want to her, honestly I couldn't care.'' Rama said, before walking away, Mohammed in tow, the sound of her high  heels stomping the ground making me shudder.




As soon as I heard the front door close, I saw the group of boys turn their attention to me, all of them with sly smirks on their face. I try to scream again, my muffled cries causing them to start hysterically laughing. The ropes around my hands stung my wrists, and I tried desperately to free myself.




The tallest one standing in the center of the couch got up and walked over to me, bending down to get a better look at me. I inched away, the reek of his breath smelling like tobacco.




''Mohammed was right, she is pretty hot.'' He said, prompting his pack of goons to start laughing again. ''But there's a little problem,'' He said, pulling his unshaven face into an expression of mock distress. ''I think she's wearing way too much clothes.'' He said in an evil tone, reaching for my leather jacket. I screamed louder, tears pouring out of my eyes. ''No, no, no!'' I tried to yell, refusing to give up. With great effort, I mustered all of the strength I had left together, and kicked him in the stomach, causing him to double over, his face turning from a smug expression to a dazed one.




He got up off the floor in a matter of seconds, pushing away his friends trying to help him up. ''You little bitch!'' He roared, his rough hand coming in contact with my cheek. I winced, crying harder. ''And I was actually going to spare you a little.'' He mockingly laughed, turning to face his friends. ''I'll take care of her, guys.'' He said, roughly picking me up from the ground and pushing me towards one of the empty rooms in the apartment. I saw the rest of the guys leave out of the apartment as well, realizing, to my horror, that it was now just me and him here. I kicked and screamed and cried out any last energy I had left. But he easily pushed me in the room, locking the door behind him.





My eyes widened as I saw him coming towards me. I begged my feet to move, but I was too horrified to move an inch. ''So you think you're pretty funny, kicking me like that?'' He shouted, shoving me into the wall.  I shrieked in agony as pain shot up my arm. He kept shoving me around a bit before he yanked my arm, pulling me close to him. ''Don't worry, I'll get you back for that.'' He smirked, ripping off the duct tape from my mouth, and cutting the ropes tying my arms with a knife he pulled out of his pocket. ''Don't bother shouting, no one lives within four floors of this apartment.'' He added, his eyes examining me like a wolf stalking it's prey.




''Please don't! just leave me alone!'' I shrieked, trying to free myself from his grasp. He darkly laughed at my struggle, throwing my bag on the floor and tugging at my leather jacket. I tried to move, but there was no energy left inside of me. I screamed and cried, when he stopped tugging on my clothes and slapped me again, my cheek now feeling raw, a white hot, scorching pain throbbing from it. ''If you make one more noise. I swear I'll kill you.'' He whispered in my ear, making my eyes widen in fear.




It dawned on me that I was helpless. No one was going to help me. No one was going to come save me. I couldn't even save myself. ''Lay down.'' He ordered, pointing to the bed behind me. I violently shook my head, crying harder. ''I said lay down!'' He barked, roughly pushing me down,. I felt my jacket slip off, and a pair of cold, hungry lips on my neck, my face.



I shut my eyes, waiting for it to be over.



*yousef.



I couldn't believe I saw her. After so long of trying to escape her. Trying to escape breaking her heart. I had even switched schools, God damn it. Why did I have to see her? I called all the guys to meet me at the car, and stalked away from the crowded carnival, my car all the way at the front of the school. When I got in my car, I lit up a cigarette, trying to get the last few minutes out of my mind.




I heard the annoying tone of my phone ringing, surprised that Amal's name lit up the screen.



''Hello?'' I said, wondering why she was calling.



''Yousef, it's Amal! You need to help Sara. I think she's been kidnapped!'' She screamed, her delicate voice filled with terror.



''What?!'' I yelled in the speaker, as I saw the Jeep's door open, Faris, Turki, and Omar climbing in. She gave me the details of the text Sara sent her, and I sped off to the back entrance, hoping I wasn't too late.




''So wait, Rama took her!?'' Faris screamed as we turned the last corner, finding no one in sight. I saw the red truck in the distance, and I followed them, careful not to be seen.


-


We had been following them for about 20 minutes, and we were now driving on a few streets, probably nearing the destination. Just as I was about to follow them. Just as we were going to turn on another street, a delivery truck cut in front of me, separating the red truck from me. I screamed, realizing we were loosing them. By the time it moved, the red truck was out of sight.




We searched the near by streets, in search for a red truck. It had been 20 minutes of agonizing searching, when I finally laid my head on the steering wheel, my brain aching in defeat. ''Fuck! We lost her!'' I yelled, anger rising in my voice.




''Wait, What's that over there?'' I heard Turki say, pointing out the window. I looked up, seeing the red truck 2 blocks away, parked in front of an old building. I sped towards it, running into the building, up the steps. How were we supposed to find which apartment?



''Are you looking for someone?'' A little girl, no older then 7 asked me, her long blondish-brown hair hanging down her back, her two front teeth missing.



''Yes! Have you seen a girl here? Maybe she was with another girl?'' I said frantically, pulling out my phone, showing the little girl a picture of Sara.



''I think I saw her! She was with another girl, and a man! But her hands were tied up, and she had something grey over her mouth. She looked very sad.'' The little girl exclaimed, pointing up the stairs.



''Where did they go?'' I asked, hope growing in my heart.



''2B! There was a lot of screaming in there. Is she okay?''



''She will be, don't worry. Thank you so much!'' I quickly thanked her, sprinting to get to the apartment.



When we found the apartment, Omar kicked down the door, seeing no one in sight. ''Where's Sara?!'' I screamed, my fists clenched, my blood boiling. I raced to the back of the apartment, going through all the rooms. I got to a locked one, slamming my fists into the door. I furiously kicked and punched at it, finally causing it to bust open.



I yelled in fury as I saw this disgusting man on top of her, her clothes thrown across the floor, her bloodshot eyes wide in fear, her hands constantly trying to push him off of her. The man quickly jumped off of her in shock, turning to face me. ''Who the hell are you?!'' He roared, stalking towards me. ''Who the hell are you?!'' I retorted, my head pounding with anger.




''I don't know why you're here, but I suggest you leave. Now.'' He threatened. He shoved me towards the door, trying to provoke a fight. I shoved back, punching him in the jaw. He punched me back in the stomach, causing me to double over in excruciating pain. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a long piece of wood, and I grabbed it, violently swinging it towards him. After a couple of attempts, I hit him on the head, sending him crashing onto the floor, unconscious.



I dropped the piece of wood, going to the horrified Sara. She was still crying, her shirt and jacket on the floor, leaving her in nothing but her bra and jeans. I grabbed her shirt from the floor, giving it to her. She put it on, getting up and hugging me. She was shaking in fear. I noticed her face, her lip cut, scratch marks on both of her arms, most of them bleeding, her cheek, raw and as red as a tomato.




''Sara, are you okay? Did he....'' I let my sentence trail off, not sure what to say. She cried harder, burying her face in my neck. ''It's okay, don't worry. I'm gonna get you out of here.'' I said to her as she pulled away.  I picked up her bag and jacket off the floor, and she slipped on her shoes. I picked her up and walked out the door. I saw Turki, Omar, and Faris standing there, their faces turned from worried to relieved as they saw Sara in my arms. She was still crying, her tears soaking my shirt. I didn't care. I didn't care about anything in the entire world, just as long as Sara was okay.




We went downstairs to the car, and I gave Faris the keys, climbing into the back seat with Sara and Omar, Her bloody arms still wrapped around my neck. There was silence the whole ride, she sounds of her quiet sobs were the only thing that filled the air.



''It's okay Sara. You're gonna be okay.'' I murmured, hoping that what I said was true.

-

Chapter 39

HEY EVERYONE! I HAVE INTERNET! well. i'm at a friend's house, and i'm using her computer to type this:p I'm not sure you're all going to be expecting what's to come in the few chapters, but that's a good thing, right? Well, this is dedicated to Fatma and @Razoon98 from twitter!

enjoy and happy new year! x

-


A gasp escaped my lips as I saw a hard, dangerous look cast over his eyes, and he pushed past me, not bothering to look at me another second. I stood there, not sure if I should say anything to him, or just run away.



''Sara!'' I heard Lulu's voice call out, her voice full of worry. ''Were gonna go back to Ghaliah's house, are you coming?'' She asked.



''Yeah, sure...'' I mumbled, trying to plaster on a smile.



She lightly grabbed my wrist, eagerly pulling me towards the girls, and I saw them talking to a group of girls from our school.



''Can I wait in the car?'' I asked, my brain feeling as if it was about to explode.



''Yeah, sure, the driver will be here in 10 minutes. I told him to wait at the back entrance '' She smiled, giving my hand a tight squeeze.



The walk took forever, my feet navigating me through the streamer filled streets. Once I got there, I noticed  it was a little less crowded there, barely anyone was around, as everyone was going home. I pulled out my phone, checking my text messages, trying to shake the thought of Yousef out of my mind. 'And just when I thought I forgot him.' I thought to myself, slightly scowling at my screen. I looked ahead, seeing a car coming my way, and hoped the driver had gotten here.




It wasn't Ghaliah's normal white Land Cruiser, it was a bright red truck with wheels half the height of me. I quickly looked away, not being able to shake the feeling that I had seen that car before. The car pulled to a stop in front of me, and I silently begged my legs to walk away.




The ridiculously over-tinted window scrolled down, girl wearing big black sunglasses and bright red lipstick, next to a guy no older then 21. He pointed at me with his yellow nailed finger, a devious look in his eye and a mischievous smirk on his face. I forced my brain to work, to realize that they were Rama and her creepy boyfriend Mohammed.



''Get in the car.'' His harsh voice cut through the silence.  



I refuse to move, my head turning back towards the carnival. If I screamed, would they hear? Would anyone hear? Maybe I should run for it. My eyes frantically search around me, praying to see someone, anyone. Would they help? Call the police?




''Wouldn't try anything if I were you.'' He chuckled darkly, cruelly twirling a sharp silver object in his rough fingers. A knife. 'This sick, deranged psychopath has a knife.' I screamed in my head. They were planning to hurt me.



Or, I feared, worse.



I bit my lip, my heart pounding furiously in my chest. If I run, he'll catch me. If I scream for help, he'll hurt me, the murderous look in his eyes not daring me to push his limits. Either way, I'm going to end up in that car.




I linger in my place for a while, praying that the driver would come already. I suddenly noticed my phone in my hand. I casually pressed my hand on my back, desperately trying to send a text to Amal, the first person on my contact list. I noticed Rama and Mohammed talking in low voices, and I seized my opportunity.




''NOT A JOKE. BIG RED TRUCK. GOING TO TAKE ME. I'M OUTSIDE. BACK ENTRANCE. HAS KNIFE. RAMA. HELP.'' I furiously typed, my sweaty palms threatening to loose grip of the phone. I pressed send, sliding the phone into my back pocket.




My eyes widened as Mohammed got out of the out of the car, the knife still in his hand, pulling me towards the car. I struggle against his harsh grasp, desperately letting out a scream for help, my eyes darting around, praying that someone would help me. Rama opened the car door, an evil look in her eye.




I started to cry, my mind racing, my body furiously trying to fight his grasp on my arms, pushing me closer and closer into the truck. I tried to scream again when I felt his hand make a harsh contact with my cheek, silencing the scream, my cry for help left soundlessly hovering in the air.. My cheek grew painfully hot, shocks of pain jolting through the entire side of my face. I cried out I was thrown in the back seat, the door slamming behind me.




What were they going to do to me?


-



I must have passed out, because suddenly I felt the car come to a stop.



''Get the hell up.'' Mohammed's voice broke the silence, his arms suddenly grabbing me, pulling me out of the car. I tried screaming when I realized I couldn't. There was a piece of tape across my mouth. My hands were tied behind my back, which left me helpless, not able to even try to fight him. I felt defeat sink into my brain, praying someone would save me.





He was dragging me into a rundown apartment building, where it looked like no one had lived there for ages. Tears slid down my cheeks as I was pulled up the steps, and down the hallway to one of the apartments. It reeked of cigarettes and beer, and there was a large group of guys, most looking like they were probably 18-20 years old. My eyes widened at the sight of all of them. I caught the hungry look in their eyes they stared at me, looking at my face, my body.




The gears in my mind slowly started to make sense of it all. Rama  told Mohammed to do this. Mohammed told his friends they could have their fun with me, do anything their disgusting, perverted minds came to think of. As long as Rama got her revenge, she could care less about me. I tried to scream, to kick my way to freedom, but his strong arms pushed me forward, roughly pushing me towards the floor, my back hitting the marble.



Tears of fear spilled out of my eyes, and all I wanted to do was die.


-

Chapter 38

Hey everyone! What can I say? Life has been busy! School has been so time consuming, plus exams are coming up, and i've been without internet since the last time I posted! I hate that every time I make you guys a promise, I just end up messing up and disappointing everyone. So all I can say right now is i'll try to post as much as I can!

Oh and Happy Early 2013!

enjoy!
-


I walked over silently, getting into the car and turning my attention in front of me, not casting a single glance in his direction. Tension rolled off of him, the atmosphere around us dense with anger. We silently drove around, not appearing to go anywhere special. I opened my mouth to speak, when I heard his cold voice shatter the silence.


''Have you checked BBM lately?'' He murmured, acid dripping in his tone.



''Have you?'' I quickly retorted, turning to face him.



''Look Sara, That picture was taken a long time ago - before you even started hanging out with Rama.''



''Do you really think I'm that stupid?'' I yelled, the picture flashing into my mind.



''Don't play innocent, Sara. You're no better then I am, trust me.'' He yelled back.



''Yousef, that wasn't what it seemed at all! We were trying to hide from the principal, on the day of that fight between me and Rama. That was a total misunderstanding.'' I screamed, tears of anger forming in my eyes.



''Do you really think I'm that stupid?'' He mocked, turning onto my house's street.




I shut up, too tired to scream anymore. How could I make him believe me?




''You know, out of all the girls in the world, I can't believe you actually would choose Rama. After all she did to me?'' I scowled.




''At least she was nice enough to tell me the truth!''



''About what?''



''Everything.'' He said shortly, stopping in front of my house.



''And you believe her because?'' I said, sighing.



He didn't reply, and I got out of the car and went into the house without another word.



*April. 


''Finally, the weekend!'' Lulu's perky voice yelled over the ring of the school bell, indicating that it was the end of that Thursday's school day.



I hadn't spoken to Yousef since that day. No calls, no texts, nothing. I felt weird, like half of me was missing.
My ''diet'' or whatever you wanted to call it was worse then ever, slowly destroying me. I didn't really care. I didn't really care about anything. Because, what I thought, was when you cared about something, it would ruin you.



As for the whole picture misunderstanding with me and Hashim, when I got back to school that Sunday he admitted to me, and everyone in the school, that Jana had threatened him and forced him to set me up, and she was the one who took the picture. It was just a part of Rama and Jana's plan, and everyone knew.



I hadn't seen Yousef around much in school, since everyone changed their class schedules. I only saw him twice, both of the times in school, a week after that day.



We were just strangers now.



''So we'll see you guys at 4:00, right?'' Fay said, picking up her bag.



''Yeah, sure.'' I said, grabbing my things, wondering about the carnival. Our school had one every year, and I heard it was loads of fun. And fun was exactly what I needed right now.

-


I dumped my bag on my desk, plugging in my phone and rushing to go take a shower and change. After my shower, I got dressed, putting on dark blue jeans and a loose black tank top, slipping on my black leather jacket and golden toms.


 I straightened my hair and put it up in a smooth ponytail, slipped on a few rings and bracelets, sprayed my Chanel no5 perfume, grabbed my black Chanel shoulder bag, wallet, and my phone, then headed out the door.


''Amal!' I screamed from downstairs, checking the time.


''I'm here, I'm here!'' She giggled, running down the stairs. She was wearing a floral tucked in blouse with bright blue jeans and golden flats, her curled hair bouncing against her shoulders.


We both went outside, getting into the car and driving off to the carnival.



When we got there, we quickly found Ghalia, Lulu, and Fay, trying out new flavors of Monster, each of them looking like weird green and blue potions. We decided to walk around a bit, and I stopped to look at a bracelet booth, when I bumped into someone.


I looked up, my eyes meeting a familiar face. He looked so much different then before, his hair was cut short,  in a very army-like style, he got taller, and his face looked harder. His chocolate brown eyes widened in surprise when he saw me, and I froze in shock, unable to move.



Yousef.

- 

Chapter 37

Hello everyone! So as you've all noticed, i haven't been posting as much. School is my number one priority right now, and blogging never seems to fit into my hectic schedule. But that doesn't mean i'm shutting down the blog. I AM GOING TO TRY TO POST ONE (very long) CHAPTER A WEEK. that's the most i can do right now.

enjoy!

-

"What is this?!" I choked.

It was a picture of me and Hashim, from the day that day me and Rama got into that fight, when we hid from the principal in that classroom.

The picture was taken at the exact moment when I backed up into the door. You couldn't see my face, but it was still pretty obvious that it was me.

I dropped the phone, fresh tears streaming down my face.

How was I supposed to explain this? "It's not what it looks like! I wasn't even doing anything, I just wanted to get the hell out of there and he helped me get away from Rama!" I pictured myself saying this to everyone, realizing it sounded pathetic.

I heard my phone ring, and I knew exactly who it was.

Yousef:D <3 is calling.

Amal picked up, and I crawled back under the cover, hoping I could just disappear.

Half of me wanted to stand up and grab the phone, desperate to explain that it was just a misunderstanding, while the other half of me wanted to tell him to get out of my life. The picture with him and Rama was NOT a misunderstanding.

"He'll be here in 5 minutes to pick you up." Amal sighed, rubbing her temples in frustration and walking out of the room.

I got up and went downstairs, finding my dad reading the newspaper.

"Hey dad, can I go over Yousef's house? We have to do a project for school."

"What? Yeah, yeah. Sure." He said, waving his arm carelessly.

I walked upstairs, unphased by his lack in interest. Before we used to be so close, but ever since summer ended, we've spoke less and less, slipping farther and farther apart.

I guess he just stopped caring about me.

I sighed, walking into my room. I went to the bathroom, washing my face and fixing my hair, tossing it to one side carlessly.

I got dressed, putting on jeans, brown knee high boots, and a tucked in blouse. I grabbed my chanel bag, storming downstairs and out the door.

there he was. leaning against his car, an icy look on his face. Something told me that, after this, me and Yousef would never be the same.

Chapter 36.

HELLO MY WONDERFUL READERS! :D. how is everyone? Well, I hope you enjoy this chapter, and um thats it? :p.

This chapter is dedicated to Y, a not so silent reader who helped me with this chapter! Thank you so much! <3. 

enjoy!

- 

The picture was of Yousef and Rama, her red lips pressed against his cheek, and him grinning at the camera. I almost screamed, but composed myself at the last second. I felt my eyes water up, and i shoved the phone back into Hessa's hands, running out of the school to the car as fast as i could. 

Amal and Fahad were waiting in the car, and Amal shot me an anxious glance, which I replied to with a ''we'll talk later'' look. I blinked, praying I wouldn't break down in the car.I looked out the window, seeing Yousef walking out of school, his face drained of all emotion. 

My best friend, my brother, my protector, my savior, my partner in crime. The one person who I trusted with everything. The person who I loved, and who loved me. The person who could make my day by just smiling. The same person who betrayed me, lied to me, backstabbed me, and broke my heart. That one person was standing right there. 

I turned away from the window, not wanting to think anymore. I looked down at my lap, trying to shut out all of my thoughts. As the car pulled away from the curb, I stole a backwards glance, seeing him staring at the car, and looking me straight in the eye with that same emotionless look in his eyes. I forced my eyes to tear themselves away from his, looking at the road ahead, not being able to look at him as we drove away, leaving him behind. 

I got home, and after greeting my father and Mariam, I ran up to my room, locking the door behind me. I threw my bag on my desk, and slid down on the floor, the unbearable tears spilling over my eyes. 

After 15 minutes, I finally stopped, my eyes feeling sore and tired. My whole body felt unbearably exhausted. I reluctantly got up, slipping off my sticky uniform and taking a cold shower, then changing into sweatpants and a bright pink Juicy shirt.


I was about to crawl into bed when I heard a knock on the door, followed by Amal bursting into my room and running over to me, holding her phone in her hand.


''Sara, have you seen this?!'' She hissed, pushing my legs and climbing next to me. Amal wasn't really a person who waited for an invitation to invade your space.


''That's old news, Amal. I already know about Yousef and Rama. Thank you so much for reminding me.'' I said in a sour tone, yanking the white douvet over my head, trying to block out her presence.


''Yousef and Rama? No, I'm talking about you and Hashem!! Why didn't you ever tell me about him?'' She shrieked, causing me to bolt up, grabbing the phone from her hand, praying that I had heard her wrong.


''Oh no.''
- 

Chapter 34

I stared at her with a look of puzzlement on my face. What on earth was she talking about?


''What?'' I said, looking anxiously at her phone screen.

''Do you have Rama Al X on BBM?'' Bdour asked urgently.

''No, why?'' I said, panic rising in my voice at the reminder of her name.


I did not like where this conversation was heading.


''Look at her picture.''

-

*Yousef's point of view.


I aimlessly walked through the halls with Faris and Sultan, not having any intentions of going to arabic class.  This week I really got to know Sultan, and the person who I thought of as creepy was actually pretty cool. There were only two more hours until school was over, so we all were headed to the roof.


''Yousef!'' I heard a familiar voice call out from behind me.



Rama.




''This girl will not leave me alone!'' I thought to myself. I sighed, turning around.


''What, Rama?'' I said, a thick edge of annoyance in my voice.


''Can I talk to you?''  She said, batting her eyelashes thick with dark clumps of mascara, or whatever the hell you call it. I examined her face, looking for any signs that she might just be joking. She was wearing tons of makeup, chunks of foundation smeared accross her face. I always hated girls who wore too much makeup. I was glad that Sara didn't do that, I thought she was beautiful just the way she was.


''Will you leave me alone then?'' I said, nodding to the guys to go on with out me.


She nodded, and watched them walk away, leaving us alone in the hallway.


''Look, i need you to do something.'' She said, a serious tone in her voice.


''And why would I help you?'' I chuckled. That girl was unbeleiveable.


''Because you wouldn't want anyone to find out about our little secret, would you?''


''You wouldn't.'' I said, trying to hide the surprise in my voice.


''I still have the picture right here.'' She said, pulling out her blackberry, scrolling through it for a few seconds, then showing me the picture on the screen.



It was a picture of me and her from last year, just a bit before Sara became friends with her. My arm was around her neck, and her lips were pressed against my cheek.  I was grinning at the camera, my smile bigger then ever.



It was taken while me and Rama were dating.

-